It is the things in common that make relationships enjoyable, but it is the little differences that make them interesting.
Spent 3 hours at the gym today. What’s up with that?
I’m a spaz and don’t particularly enjoy -shudder- exercise.
I ski well because the boots hold me up and swim well due to buoyancy issues.
Between the full-tilt 45 minutes of cardio exercise, then stretches, a swim and a steam time flew. I do feel much better and have lost another 2 pounds, which was prior to the steam. Hmmm I weigh less now than I did when I got married. That would be the first time.
Of course certain portions of my body have shifted since then so thank the goddess for both underwire brasseries and my fine legs remaining the same through all time.
It was my first time for a steam, I’ve always been a sauna gal. Not any more.
I’ve decided to stage my ultimate demise in a steam room, enveloped in the warm sensuous arms of the wet eucalyptus air.
Now about Hell….Valentines Day is fast approaching. I abhor it and am suffering attacks of melancholy already.
It wouldn’t be Valentine’s Day without several of my blogs reviling this horrific holiday and my own distate and growing depression as the 14th approaches!
As per every year past I have no beau for this official day of mourning.
Oh god pierce my dark little heart.
There have been coffee dates, dinner dates, ski dates, due dates and fresh dates over the past year and a half. I have fallen hard for two men but it has not been reciprocated. Except once and that jackass left me for his ex. Men have fallen for me but I have not felt the same towards them.
Typical of the world in all facets.
Please explain the loneliness and wish for a companion which many of us feel.
I’m too old for sport fucking and it’s not satisfying at all. Hell it’s depressing and instills a feeling of self-loathing. So why bother. It’s the companionship, the shared jokes, cuddling against one another at night in bed.
So again this year I am unattached. Maybe too peculiar and/or curvey, verbose, dark, facetious, brainy, outspoken, old, silly, picky, neurotic or all the aforementioned.
Maybe because I’m too honest about my thoughts and feelings. God forbid we tell another person how we feel. It’s very bad form you know. You’re supposed to play the fucking game. Whether writing, in a career or with human interactions. Jesus.
I do know one thing: this only contributes to my agitation and increasingly morose demeanor as February 14th approaches. I Hate Valentine’s Day.
I’m tired of being all alone every damned V-Day.
There I said it. –hangs head in shame-
Screw the cards and gifts. It’s that vague sense of being rejected that permeates every single woman’s psyche on February 14th.
The truth is out and you’re all privy to the knowledge that my professed dislike is a result of being painfully single on a day designed for people in love.
Well maybe someday things will change right? Perhaps a certain somebody will call me and I’ll have a Valentine this year. Otherwise it’s just me, some bad flicks on DVD, and a lack of See’s chocolate.
In honor of the approaching day of despair here is a little survey:
1. Do you like anyone? Very few people and no I will not admit to liking a special someone
2. Do they know it? Yes because I was an idiot and made a hint. pretty much fucked that up now didn’t we
IN THE LAST MONTH HAVE YOU
1. Had someone buy you something? Yes thank goodness for friends
2. Bought something? Groceries, gas for the car, gifts for my daughter, a leather garter belt; hey it’s gorgeous so lay off. Retail therapy was indicated that day.
3. Gotten sick? Where do I start? In myriad ways…
4. Been hugged? Yes by my daughter every day. She’s the light of my life
5. Felt stupid? Regularly. It’s called life
6. Talked to an ex? An ex axe-murderer. Does this count?
7. Missed someone: All the time
8. Danced crazy: Ya and it was hella fun
9. Gotten your hair cut? hell yeah and colored in a non-conformist manner as well. As is customary
10. Lied? Probably not
HAVE YOU EVER. . .
1. Said “I Love you” and meant it? Why say it if you don’t mean it?
2. Given money to a homeless person? yes
3. Waited all night for a phone call that never came? Let me count the times….
4. Sat and looked at the stars? Every chance I can
5. Do you swear? Exactly what the fuck do you mean by that?
6. You’re happy with your hair? Whoa. Random
7. Do you like to swim? Naked. Okay any way I can
8. Call a friend when you’re bored? I usually blog to avoid human contact
9. Flowers or angels? Flowers…. Angels? Are you on goddamned happy pills?
10. Gray or black? black.
11. Color or black and white photos? black and white
12. Lust or love? love AND lust together.
13. Sunrise or sunset? Sunset but preferably midnight
BONUS VALENTINE’S QUESTIONS
1. You have a valentines planned out to have? No. Excuse me while I sharpen this razor blade and check for Hemlock in the pantry
2. Do you like having a valentine? I wouldn’t know
3. Does someone like you currently? Only the ever-changing cast of stalkers.
4. Are you even worried about the upcoming holiday? Worried no. suicidal yes.
5. What’s the best gift to receive on the day? Just being able to spend it with someone that you care deeply for
–End of that Weird Tangent–
Now it’s back to work for Satan… this would my present client whom I have sold my soul to.
Thanks for joining me on this unfocused journey tonight and have a pleasant tomorrow.